The following 246 words of Penis humour have been hurriedly written before going to bed and are requests 
and forceful suggestions to the penis to remain normal and limp until I am married to the woman I love. This is also in some ways a fun poem on the penis by a sexually healthy young man who does not want to sleep with anyone except the woman he loves. Copyright: Musepaper [image from the web].
My dear Penis
Stop being heinous
You cock-a-hoop
And I’m in the soup
You may be a dick
But I don’t have my chick
Oh my cock
You’re hard like a rock
You give me a shock
I have taken stock
I know you are sad
And probably mad
But wait my dear
Until she is here
Wait for my girl
Until then please curl
Stay calm in the pant
And do not rant
Stay subdued
Don’t be so rude
You will screw
But you must construe
That this love is true
So do not pooh-pooh
Don’t expand and stand
And throw tantrums grand
Do not tease
Stay normal please
And just say cheese
Don’t look around
And hear moans and sounds
I can’t be like them
Will sleep only with ‘my’ dame
Be wary of these women
Who want my semen
I am dying for sex
But It’s very complex
So please do not vex
Don’t throw a hissy
And don’t be so fussy
I want marital bliss
Not one night stands
Or even a pre-marital kiss
I cannot cheat on her
So please concur
Please be kind
I want peace of mind
Learn some manners refined
Don’t put me in a bind
Let us wait
For my soul mate
We will copulate
Now get this straight
There’ll be no more debate
Don’t be so dumb
You know she’s awesome
I’ll wait for her
So please defer
Until she’s there
Please control
That’s all.
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